Baby Mine

The morning of November 16^th 2011 was one of the tenderest moments I’ve experienced. To read a positive pregnancy test for the first time ever, was so much more overwhelming than I could have imagined.  I always envisioned that I would leap for joy the instant I read the result, but I couldn’t help but place my hand over my mouth and stare at that little stick holding the truth of my future, thinking “is this really happening, really true, really MY turn”?  I couldn’t help but cry for joy, for love, for gratitude.  As the day went on and a few tests more, I was convinced this was real.  Every time we shared the news with someone new, it became more and more valid.  But one of the first moments we truly began to grasp that we would have a little baby of our own was when James came home a couple weeks later with our baby’s first outfit.  A blue onsie with white lettering that says “my daddy and I root for the Cowboys”.  My heart melted, at the desire he had to be the first person to buy our child something, at how tiny it was, and that 9 months later our little sweet-tart would actually be wearing it.  What a time of praising and thankfulness my heart was experiencing, for God to allow me to carry a child of His on this earth.  I have desired this experience for so long, at one point I had to continually remind myself the truth of God’s Word in Proverbs 8:34 “Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway.”  I didn’t want to wait on His timing to begin our family; I was saddened that it wasn’t my turn yet.  But God transformed my heart, He taught me to relax and know that He would bless the waiting.  Are you waiting on God in some way?  Is it difficult?  Frustrating?  Sad?  I’ve been there, and will fight those urges again someday I’m sure of it.  But may Proverbs 8:34 be an encouragement to you in your time of waiting.  Trust His Word is true for you!